I’ll be in Vegas this time tomorrow. I called Susie Sunshine crying and whining that I just couldn’t do it.
SS: What’s the problem?
There is no one in this world that is more unaffected by anything that Susie Sunshine. Nothing bugs her. Maybe it’s surviving 4 boys. Maybe it’s that she is Lutheran. Maybe it’s living in that place in Michigan that will require three flight segments to get to Vegas on Sunday. I don’t know.
K: I just pulled The Baby out of a vat of white ink (wailing).
SS: You pull one of those kids out of a vat of ink EVERY SINGLE DAY. Today it’s white. What did you do?
K: I kinda sorta cleaned him off.
SS: Well that’s good.
K: Hold on. Nathan, stop chewing on that box of matches.
SS: You’ll get your stuff done.
TB: Mom.mom.mom.mom. There is a penny stuck to your bottom.
K: Nathan, stop smacking my ass. That’ll teach me to run around in my underwear.
SS: You are in your underwear?
K: Please. Nathan just walked by with a hammer and a three inch roofing nail. I gotta go.
SS: Do you have any idea how funny conversations with you are?
K: It’s not funny when it’s happening to you.
I won’t even tell you ahat happened when I attempted to close my eyes for two seconds yesterday and I woke to the front door slamming when The Husband came home. Have you ever noticed how packing popcorn can multiply like fleas and how easy it is to actual cover an entire room? Or two? Not that we would know anything about that…

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