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    Extreme Bed and Breakfasting

    June 20, 2011

    God bless Cousin KateI take pride in my hospitality skills. Grant it, for some periods of my recent life it’s been hit or miss (“my what a lovely mushroom lasagna with homemade pasta” or “Is this delivery? NO, it’s DiGiorno!) but when I’m on, I am ON! Okay, the house might be trashed but your sheets will always be 600 thread count, clean and have a ridiculous amount of fabric softener and you have your own bathroom. Ear plugs upon request.

    Now that it’s summer, your bed and breakfast stay may include an evening of zip lining, Swing of Terroring, bottles and bottles of home brew, a hammock, a dozen tiki torches, a fire pit and hours of conversation. You may even get a few moments of peace when your hosts go to bed.

    If your host’s last neighborhood suffered from home invasions before the move, you quite possibly will meet a habitually locked door when you finally attempt to go to bed. You will round the house and find the garage door open (???) but every door will be locked. You may knock on the door but no one will hear you. You’ll return to the comfy hammock and think, “this isn’t so bad.” Until the blinding rain comes. You’ll seek cover on the back porch on a chaise lounge where you will weather out the night and the storm until your six-year-old second cousin once removed sneaks downstairs to watch t.v. at 6:30.

    Chateau Cookie. Always an adventure. Wouldn’t you agree, Cousin Kate?

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    1. Meg says:

      Oh no.

      June 20th, 2011 at 7:53 am

    2. Manic Mommy says:

      On the plus side, those 600 thread count sheets are still fresh! I would have parked under your window and leaned on the horn.

      June 20th, 2011 at 9:40 am

    3. sue {laundry for six} says:

      I hope she got a discount.

      June 20th, 2011 at 10:09 am

    4. Kristen says:

      Meg, oh, yes.

      Chris. No car, dead battery on her phone (which is why she was finally coming in). I said I would have done whatever it took to the cops there. But I live nowhere. And my car was locked. Still mortified.

      June 20th, 2011 at 12:07 pm

    5. Suniverse says:

      Well, that’s markedly shitty.

      Stupid Target. Are they TRYING to become WalMart and make me hate them?

      June 29th, 2011 at 7:02 am

    6. x♥x♥, gina says:

      Aw, she was raised well, my kids (or I) would have threw a rock threw your window, lol.

      June 29th, 2011 at 7:55 am

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