K: Where is your folder?
Ethan: I don’t know. MOM! We need to find a place to put my bag EVERY SINGLE DAY so I have a routine and can find it.
K: Who said those words to you?
E: My teacher.
K: Exactly. Did you mention to her that you have a specific HOOK by the door for your bag?
E: No. I forgot.
K: Just like you forgot to hang up your bag. Your bag, dude. Your problem.
Fastforward to the afternoon, when I find his folder. Inside is a yellow face for yesterday, which is not a green . I lie in wait to attack him as he gets off the bus.
K: I found your folder today.
K: What’s up with the yellow deadpan face from yesterday?
E: What are you talking about?
K: Yellow face with a mouth that goes like this (miming a horizontal line).
E: I think she had to use yellow because she lost her green pen.
K: (holding up the evidence) Seriously? She lost her green pen? So she used a yellow pen and accidently made a face like this? (miming horizontal line again)
E: Oh. Well these kids were talking to me and they wouldn’t stop and then I got in trouble.
K: So you told me she lost her green pen?
E: I didn’t want you to be mad.
K: I just cruised past mad, my friend.
His father thought the lie was clever. This is what I’m working with, people. I am so screwed.