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    Take THAT, Martha Stewart

    October 28, 2009

    We are just going to pretend that last three months of silence never happened, shall we?

    OK, so I made this costume for K2 as part of my job and partly because my children watch Dinosaur Train incessantly. Whatever.
    The problem is, once I did this, I thought I could do anything. Like I’m the reincarnation of Coco Chanel or something. As Halloween is creeping up on us, I called The Husband with the bad news.

    K: I want to make The Closer a Halloween outfit.
    D: (Sigh)
    K: I’m serious. Don’t be all “sigh-y” on me.
    D: What are you going to make him?
    K: I don’t know. I was thinking a Pea in a Pod but all those costume patterns suck and just because I made one costume doesn’t mean I need to be all “I can whip up something better” right now. I should take it slow.
    D: So….
    K: How about a lamb? I found one on Martha Stewart. I expected to find 60 steps. Like when I tried to make that Martha Stewart Mile High Lemon Meringue Pie and I think she wanted you to grind your own wheat for the pie crust or something. So I was thinking her instructions would be something like that for the costume. You know, to include weaving your own fabric….
    D: Do the instructions call for going out and sheering two sheep to weave your fabric? Or would that be gathering the wool from two sheep by simply using a comb?
    K: That’s awesome. Wouldn’t that be awesome? I would totally do it.
    D: So what is it?
    K: It’s not that bad. It is only like 5 steps.

    I started to tell him and he did that Phone Glazed Over voice and I just hung up on him. Too bad he didn’t stick around for the part where I was gonna tell him the baby has to wear girl tights.

    That’ll teach him.

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