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    The Baby Car and the State Policeman

    July 3, 2008

    clip_image002.jpgclip_image004.jpgSo there I was tooling down Card Sound Road in the Florida Keys, not a soul on the open road, with just water and mangos on both sides and the sun just setting, truly a beautiful night to be driving in a 1976 MGB roadster (top down) when I notice flashing red lights and a state policeman roaring up behind me. I pulled over and got out to greet “the man.”


    “Well I hope you stopped me because you just wanted to see my neat car and not because you thought that I was traveling a bit to fast.”


    He answered back reading my name off my name printed on my baseball hat…Well ,Mr. Hammond it’s more towards the latter but I also do think that you have a pretty neat looking car. Mr. Hammond you were doing 75 in a 55 mph zone. “55 mph zone you got to be kidding”, it must be a error, the baby car wasn’t having any difficulty doing 75…it was just flat purring like a kitten.


    He said,  ‘Mr. Hammond that’s another point…I remember these old cars naturally sounding a bit loud but this one seems much louder.”


    I told him that nature had nothing to do with it, that I took little Betsy here down to Southern Muffler where Leroy had all kinds of sounding mufflers…I think that he called this one “bad ass”. Than I asked him “if this was his car and his muffler how fast would he be driving and would he replace this muffler”. He said that I definitely had a point.


    I shared that I sincerely hoped that he wasn’t going to put a dent in my second childhood and that there is a donut shop at the end of the road and that I further promise not to bring up the fact that technically I pay his salary or ask the question “why aren’t you out catching real criminals”…that I could be back in 10 minutes with some KRISPY KREMES… providing that there aren’t any more cops up the road. He told me to tell them that I was on a coffee run for Bob and to mind their own business.


    After the coffee run I was passing the shopping mall when the light turned red and I had to take my foot off of the gas petal and “bad ass” just rumbled, setting off every car alarm in the shopping malls parking lot and I thought for a minute that maybe…but it was just for a minute.


    Kristen’s Dad

    Mr. Hammond

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    1. Kris says:

      Mr. H!!! 🙂
      Gee and I wonder where Kris gets it from…

      ~Kris (T.) from good ‘ol Mauger Road 🙂

      July 3rd, 2008 at 8:51 pm

    2. Manic Mommy says:

      You got the hat because people mistook you for Jimmy Buffett, huh?

      Enjoy your second childhood!

      July 4th, 2008 at 6:24 am

    3. Backpacker Momma says:

      Thats awesome.

      July 4th, 2008 at 12:52 pm

    4. Meg says:

      I love this. I have been trying to get my mom to do a guest post – maybe if she finds out your dad’s guesting, she’ll jump in!

      July 5th, 2008 at 8:00 am

    5. Jennifer says:

      Card Sound is totally worth the $1 toll. At least if some idiot crashes on Card Sound you can turn around and get the heck out of there. No hope of that on The Stretch. Who’s idea was it to run continuous concrete barriers from Key Largo to that marina on the county line? Trapped, with no hope of coffee or cocktails…

      July 9th, 2008 at 12:38 pm

    6. Cheryl says:

      Rock that second childhood!

      (ps – mine’s going to be a “Bumblebee” Camaro!)

      May 10th, 2011 at 9:48 am

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