So we are downstairs sitting on the couches, drinking the coffee I made from the beans The Cake Lady brought.
CL: The boys are being to quiet. We should check on them.
K: They’re FINE.
The fact that I am such a moron amazes me too.
K: Listen. We have nothing upstairs. Not even nothing dangerous. Just nothing.
CL: But we haven’t HEARD them.
The Baby was asleep but I decided to check on The Boy and His Lovah so his mother would feel better. I did the low crawl up the stairs and listened at the bedroom door. They were going on and on and on and on about nothing. I have no idea where they get it. We went back downstairs to go on and on and on about nothing.
K: I told you.
CL: I know you did, but I don’t trust them.
10 minutes later they came down the stairs. Without their shoes. Which, might I add, is something I NEVER would have noticed.
CL: Where are your shoes?
Harrison: I left them upstairs.
K: I’ll get them.
I raced up the stairs and threw open the door. My sinuses could not have cleared faster if I had stepped into the Roman baths. I raced back down the stairs.
K: Where is it?
The Boy: I don’t know, Mom.
K: Where is the bottle of Vick’s Baby Rub?
The Boy: Mom, what are you talking about?
Harrison: We don’t have it.
I snatched him up because he was closer and shoved his feet into his mother’s face.
CL: Yep. Where is the bottle?
Harrison: We didn’t do it, Mom.
K: Where did you put it on?
CL: Just tell us and it will be okay. We just need to know that you didn’t eat it.
Not exactly. It won’t be okay. I don’t care if you ate it. I just want to be sure that when I step into the bathroom, I won’t lose both feet from underneath me.
K: Yeah, what she said. Where did you put it?
Harrison: Just our feet.
CL: Good. Why did you put it on your feet?
The Boy: That’s where it goes.
Nana. We have Nana to thank for that one.
And the bottle is still MIA.
If your bored, you can also find me over at PBS waxing unpoetic about my former dating life and Pride and Prejudice. Leave a comment so I look popular. You don’t even have to tell me I look pretty…