Dr: So how do YOU feel like you are doing as parents?
K: I think we have made a lot of mistakes. Don’t you (turning to The Husband)?
D: Nah, I think we are good.
Dr: Well, Kristen, what kind of mistakes do you think you have made?
K: I think someone (nodding in The Husband’s direction) teaching him how to use a drill was probably unwise. He’s two. Now you give him one of those play drills and he looks at you like you just handed him a toaster oven. Without a cord, of course. Because we all know how much he loves the toaster. Kid would make toast all day long if given the chance. Thank God for the ding on the toaster so you have some sort of warning BEFORE he burns the house down. OK, bad analogy. But you understand where I am going with this?
D: (clearly now defensive) It’s not like I showed him how to use a drill bit.
K: Yeah, cause this one is such a slow learner. Two more times of watching you use that drill and he’ll have it mastered.
D: So there will be a couple of holes in the wall.
K: I don’t care about holes in the wall. I worried about holes in the appendages. I really don’t have to know the people in the new ER already. And what about the time you were letting him use the jigsaw in front of my mother. Like she doesn’t have enough to worry about.
D: He does great with the jigsaw.
I say all of this because yesterday he walked by with The Baby and The Baby was tightly clutching a Philips head screw driver to his chest. And he was REALLY happy.
D: Well he really wanted it and he just grabbed it out of my hand.
Of course. History is doomed to repeat itself in #2. Let the games begin.