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    This is supposed to be my ‘ode to Derek’ post

    April 6, 2007

    but can I just take a moment to say that when Don from Sony support called to say there was extensive water damage to my laptop and that the underwriters need a REASON for the water damage, it felt disturbingly like the time I was on the phone with the cell phone insurance trying to get a new phone and they told me I had extensive water damage after that one miniscule snowflake landed on a contact.  Not to be confused with the time The Boy put my cell phone into the gin and tonic.  I fessed up to that one.  You think I would have noticed extensive water damaging behavior.  I explained to Don that my laptop doesn’t even come near liquid, and he acted as if I was lying.   Besides the fact that it is wrong, I have no incentive to lie.  I have Sony laptop insurance that covers absolutely everything.  Despite that, Don told me he would give me a day to think about it (I want you to go to your room and think about what you have done and no dinner for you, missy) and he’ll be calling me back for a reason for the “extensive water damage.”  Also known as the “when-we-don’t-know-what-is-wrong-we’ll-blame-it-on-water.”  I intend to tell him today that The Boy dropped the laptop into a gin and tonic. 

    Back to my husband, who is making JP2’s fast track to sainthood look like a leisurely walk in the park.

    This weekend I decided that the reason my house isn’t selling is because of the 1970’s vinyl in the bathroom.  I went to Home Depot and got some high class $18.88 vinyl to replace it.  I got home and my husband flat out refused to pull up the old stuff.  He wanted to just leave the old because it was too difficult.  My MIL said she absolutely LOvED the old vinyl and said my bathroom looks beautiful.  I don’t fault her for blatantly lying because ever since I became a mother, I realized that’s what mothers do for their children.  My FIL did convince my husband to buy me a $30 hoe-like contraption that I insisted they take back because who has $30 for a hoe?

    Until I started the project.  That I worked on for 1 1/2 hours while the children slept (I’d like to take a timeout to give God a shoutout for that brief moment of sanity) and still isn’t done. 


    Getting 30 year old vinyl to do anything is like getting any 30 year old man to do anything.  If it isn’t his idea, it ain’t gonna happen.  So now I have my work cut out for me today.  Thank God for the $30 hoe.

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    1. InterstellarLass says:

      He’s going to give you time to ‘think about it’? WTF??? Tell him you thought about it and decided yes, he is an ass, now fix the damn computer.

      I have two layers of 30 year old tile in my bathroom, and the only reason it wants to come up is due to water damage from a leaky water heater. That should save me from buying the $30 hoe. Thank goodness for small blessings.

      April 6th, 2007 at 2:34 pm

    2. akgqrqbf says:

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      October 28th, 2007 at 5:17 pm

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